Gratitude

God never gives you a season without a reason.

What season of life are you in right now?

Sometimes raising children isn’t easy (at least for me anyway). We try and try and never seem to measure up to what we think we should be as a parent. Comparing, relating, trying, failing, succeeding. Or maybe you are rocking it and feeling beyond confident that your kids are and will be the best. 

 Or maybe our marriage doesn’t quite look like we thought it would when we dreamt of it long ago. Or maybe it is the life you have worked so hard at and are sharing it with your best friend by your side. 

Or maybe we don’t see our life measuring up to what we had hoped it should be.  Or we are accomplishing our dreams and aspirations and yearning for much much morez 

Or maybe our friendships and relationships aren’t as strong a deeply connected as we want.  Or possibly they are just as perfect as you had hoped and you have the best of friends that you share life with. 

Whatever the case is for you on your life journey, it is so important to find Grace in the moments we have and share with others. It may not be perfect or look the way we dreamed, but it’s what our life is made of.

Parenting isn’t easy and every new day presents challenges that we must face and overcome. It also has so many joys that we also need to slow down and breath in before its too late. When your first kid is on the way EVERYONE tells you- time goes by so fast enjoy it. And to be honest you kind of roll your eyes at it... until one day you wake up and see your 5 year old dressed and ready for school and think (silently and in awe) all those people were right.

Marriage takes work EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. God didn’t intend for married life to be easy and happy and no work at all. He gave us every tool possible to search for Him and develop our marital bond into the strongest relationship we can possibly have with someone because of His love. Find a way to make your high seasons higher and your low seasons less frequent. Take the time to say I love you. Take the time to share, truly share, your life with your spouse— not just the every day hustle stuff. Remember every day why you chose them to spend forever with. 

Make your life goals a priority. So many moms (myself included) have gotten lost in being a mom or a wife or student or whatever title you have and we don’t know how to move forward into what our heart desires. This is sad for us! Take time in every day to discover who you are, what you enjoy, and what you desire from life. It WILL make you more patient, loving, caring, and present when younallow yourself a mental break from the grime and feed your soul. 

friendships.. oh y’all do i struggle with this one. It’s sad truthfully. We all of course live life and we are “busy”... but won’t we always be busy unless we MAKE the time for them? Isn’t it important to carve out time for ourselves, spouses, children, & our friends? These are the people we look to for guidance, comfort, laughter, and so much more. As I get older and I discover more about myself, I know just how much having a true friend that you can always call on means. Seek out friendships that challenge you to grow, be the best version of yourself, and are willing to catch you when you stumble (ya know, cuz you had too much wine!)

If we stop comparing our life to others or to a fairy tale, I am certain, we would all find our life is amazing and fulfilling in the ways that make our heart happy. Some of us love the beach, while others the mountains, and still others somewhere in between. 

Be grateful for every moment.

Give thanks to the good

Enjoy the little moments

Think of all the people you are grateful for, have you thanked them? Do they know how much they impact your life? What’s stopping you from telling them right now?

Power of Love

Love is a strange, hard to explain, well it's an emotion. We feel it and we believe it is there, but at what point does it mean you are meant for someone, that you are soul mates? What defines the person we are "meant" to be with forever? Is it a connection? A friendship? The right attitude? Similar beliefs? Our interests?

Many believe our purpose in life is to ultimately procreate (maybe you are right). When we break it all down it appears we (humans) are all connected by our emotions. The institution of marriage itself is scary for most... I think instead  of wondering if it will last forever, you have to make it last with our/your conscious efforts and the willingness to give to your chosen partners. Marriage should always be a 50/50 balance between spouses. Life is not easy for anyone and love is not any easier. Why make it harder on ourselves?

I've previously been hurt many times by the “lust” of what the younger version of me felt what LOVE was. I'm sure we can all relate to the same situations. I no longer have the patience for the games people will play with each other because of what our society has played up the bachelor/bachelorette status to be. A challenge to a younger reader to have for their said love: Can you (the man) see inside me (no not literally), beyond my looks to find who I am and what I can be? The bigger question is, Will you? When you know beyond a doubt that the man/boy you love can see you for you, you've found a special one!

Love comes in all shapes an sizes. It is not just about loving someone as your significant other, maybe it is the love of a parent, grandparent, cousin, sibling, child, or a friend. oh, but a child's love is like no other. They have yet to discover the pains and heartaches that come and go through life. They know not what death is. Their love is pure and unconditional, and they long for your kind words and loving arms to wrap them up and make them feel safe. How can we show someone what love is that has been striped of love? I look around me every day and see the beauty of life and nature and wonder how some people can turn to violence and crime. Have you ever tried to imagine what kind of life people lead to become that way? Even stealing, raping, fighting, it is all something beyond my view of the world. I find it hard to believe people can be that selfish, but I also know there are things beyond control like addiction that can take over an amazing person and turn them into someone ugly, even they don't even recognize themselves anymore. Maybe I have a big heart or maybe I am naive, but either way I wish I could somehow reach out to those, who for a moment even consider doing such things, to show them what life can be like if they made a choice to take a different path. If only they step out of their current situation and look beyond... look at what could and can be. We should all work together to make it a place worth living in; a place we all can enjoy.

Do I know people that have turned to violence and a life of crime, yes. I love some of these people with all my heart. I want so much to change their world with a swish of a wand, but I have no magic powers and that would be too easy. I truly believe that only you can change who you are, where you are, and what you do in your life. You can look to others for support and encouragement. At the end of the day, only you can choose to make that change, only YOU. So if you know the same kind of people I speak of, and you love them, offer them love (not money, they can get a job or find work) and maybe you can help change the person they've become, the person they do not want to be. No need for lectures, I'm sure you've given them and they haven't really REALLY listened. No need for telling them about what they've done wrong, they know. No need for looking back on the past, rather focus on the future, because their future is worth it.

Leon Brown said, "The love you give today, is an investment in the future, for the future is seeded by what you sow today." It's never too late to Love.

Whatever the reason or the person you chose to love, I hope you do it with all your heart and give it 100%. Do you know someone who could use a little love and a lot less lecture?

This Video--LOVE IT

On the Road

Growing up and traveling overseas has its advantages for visiting places many only dream of. I know I have been fortunate and I am so grateful. BUT I am so excited to take trips and travel the open road of the United States. 

It all started two years ago, I decided to go on a road trip with my (then) 13 month old. We began our journey from Oklahoma and spent two weeks exploring sites in Texas, New Mexico, Arizona (my favorite), and California. Texas offered many Silos and farmland to ponder upon via I40 west. There is something slightly eery, yet spectacular about silos that I am drawn to. New Mexico was pretty and reminded me of living in the desert again. Old town Albuquerque was a neat little stop with a town square of shops and local vendors.

Arizona really was marvelous. We drove through the Painted Desert and the Petrified Forest. We stayed in Flagstaff, it is the perfect little 'mountain town 'with a great downtown and lots of local breweries. Visited the breathtaking Grand Canyon at sunrise. This is huge for me because I am not a morning person so for me to wake up and drive over an hour away to catch the sun rising at 4:50am is RARE (as in highly unlikely to ever occur again). It was so much more than I could have ever dreamed possible. I then drove down to Scottsdale to visit a friend for a few days. We ate at a place called Culinary Dropout. I definitely recommend a visit if your in town or maybe your new to the area and havent tried it yet! We also did a morning hike up Camelback Mountain, which provided breathtaking views of the greater Pheonix area. It was on to California after that. San Diego was the first stop where my now fiance met us out there for four days. Sad part is it rained almost the entire time and after speaking with locals it hadn't rained in almost 4 years! So needless to say we must make it back sometime. We did enjoy the Zoo and a sailboat ride. Best meal here was at a place called Barley Mash. We proceeded to drive North on the coast of California stopping at various beaches along the way making our way to my family in Atascadero. It was so nice to see family that we don't get to see often (Love you all and miss you if you're reading). 

Pismo Beach Pier, CA

Lunch in Flagstaff, AZ with my uncle

A little walk in the Petrified Forest, AZ

Grand Canyon

Was I brave to do all of that with a 13 month old, absolutely! But she did amazing and it was so much fun and it was a much needed trip to get out of Oklahoma and to see some of the country that I never had before. 

2015 was a year of many road trips too! St. Louis: went to the Zoo, Science center, & the Arch. California: a last minute trip for family. Kahoka, MO: visited with Paul's grandparents and attended the Old Settler's parade

We are loaded up in the car now (with my daughter turning 3 tomorrow) heading to Park City, UT for a family ski vacation. We started in Frisco, TX after celebrating the New Year. Driving west to highway 287N through the panhandle of OK. It was my first time & really not much to see off the highway. Unfortunately we drove into Colorado in the dark & overnighted in the farm town of Lamar. We woke and began our drive once more. Paul got super excited when we saw the tip of the Rockies off in the distance!  We stopped in Fort Collins for lunch, ate at Coppersmith's Pub & Brewing. We all had burgers and they were yummy! It's located in the central part of town on a really cute town square. I wish we had more time there, but it was onto Wyoming for us. Wyoming was another first time. Its beautiful! Snow covered rolling hills until you rise into the Rockies. We watched the sunset here today- It's a total "breath of fresh air." Tomorrow we will drive into Park City and spend the week skiing, ice skating (in Elsa's ice skates! Thank you Aunt Crystal & Uncle Ethan), tubing, and enjoying the company of family.

CO via I70

Northern Rockies via I80

Road trips are not for everyone, but if you enjoy taking your time to get somewhere with little adventures throughout the day to break up the constant road time, they are so much fun. Its quality family time and I love that so much. We get caught up in the every day little things and we forget to take time for us. It's wonderful to look around in the vehicle and know I'm surrounded by love and the people that make me happy and I don't need anything else. 
Take the time to be grateful for the special people in your life and know that you put them there for a reason. It's truly the little things in life that bring me so much joy. 

Happy New Year! What are the little things that bring you joy? Tell me any great road trip locations that are a must!!

Family pic with the WY sign!

Testing Faith (when it's all you have)

Faith is(may be) the absence of fear, belief without proof, to the religious it is trust in god (whatever he/she/it may be) to do what is best for you, love without boundaries, everlasting friendships.

How can someone loose faith? This is losing life...becoming angry with who you are and what you've become. Instead of loosing faith you have to put your faith in another place, not in people and not in things, but in yourself and in your heart. Faith cannot be created nor destroyed it just is--its the physics of life!

My favorite quote, one that has kept me positive and humbled in my faith is Exodus 14:14 which reads, The Lord will fight for you, you only need to be still. In our world it is easy to get caught up in the hustle ‘n bustle of daily life, but if we can take a moment to be still and listen the Lord is caring for us all. He is with us in every choice we make, every path we chose, and every hello we say. So when you feel like you are losing your faith, be still. Listen. Embrace your future. Keep your faith.

If ever taken by the hand and asked to follow, would you? If told to trust and ask no questions, would you? If given the opportunity to turn back time if just for a moment, maybe to say something differently or to change something that you'd done, would you?

I honestly think that life has its higher purpose, even if there was a time machine that could take me back to when I was younger or to a certain time in my life, I would not use it. I have never been more humble in my life and i hope to continue to become more humble as i grow. I have had a great man in my life who I loved with my all my heart and soul; who took care of me and loved me for who I am, he gave me a wonderful daughter. Family and friends to make my days go a little smoother and make things more interesting. Attending a great school--trying to get that degree, and as the days go by doing more and more things that interest me and are benefiting myself as well as others.

So when asked if I would change anything in my past.. I wouldn't, everything in my past has lead me to enjoy all the wonderful things I have now. The past has taught me how to better myself in situations and I have learned from previous mistakes. When asked to hold a hand and follow, I will not. I will simply hold the hand and help to guide me (us) in the right direction. Hoping along the way things do not get too rough and we can always find our way to better places. If asked to trust and ask no questions, I would not. How can we live life without asking questions, like how or why? If you are ever in doubt of something, ask. Because from that you will learn, from that you will become a more knowledgable person.

Building a better me

Anyone ever get the urge to do more with their life? To be somewhere better than where you currently are?

Well, I did! The combination of some big things happening (cannot discuss in detail now, but more to come on that later), an executive leadership course (one of the final courses in my Adult studies program at Oklahoma Wesleyan University), and a desire from within to use my degree and knowledge to really make a difference in my life and my daughters life.

So.. now I had this urge and some things that could potentially be of use to me in my life, but it wasn't/isn't so simple. I need to have a plan and a purpose and a WHY for whatever path I choose to take. That is where the leadership course and a book written by Dave Braun and Troy Amdahl, Oola: Find Balance in an Unbalanced World comes into play. It is a great quick read and with a little effort ( okay a lot of effort on my part) I can make changes every day to a greater good, a more balanced life, a dream world so to speak. The leadership course made me realize the things that interest me in life are far from my grasp and the book has lead me to a belief that with the right path and discipline I can achieve my goals.

Digging a little deeper: a little over two years ago, I lost my best friend, my love, my partner, my daughter's father, and my fiancé. I had always believed we should live each day to the fullest, but that became a more prominent task after realizing this life can be cut short when God says it's time. This event has sparked a desire to live a balanced and healthy life. Over the last two years I have grieved and mourned and had to be strong for our daughter. Was it easy? Absolutely not. But finding a way to balance the way I was feeling with the needs of my daughters seemed to push me to continue every day.

So over the last month I have been reading the Oola book and want to continue to balance my life out. They suggest seven keys areas of life are worth balancing in order to stay healthy and happy. The areas are Fitness, Finances, Family, Field, Faith, Friends, & Fun. Towards the end of the book they give a three step method for living a more Oola life (this can also be found at www.oolalife.com ) .

Step 1: Fill out an Oola Wheel. The areas I need to focus on the most are Field, Finances, Fitness, Faith, and Fun. I am not sure what their basis for areas needing improvement, but for me it was anything with an average less than 7 out of 10.

Step 2: Develop a plan to change the key areas where you are wanting to make changes. start with small goals and work up to a bigger goal so that daily we are improving and making progress to a better me.

Step 3: Follow a path- make a conscious choice and write it down for a path that I will take to obtain my goals and alter it with any changes that need to be made along the way.

Just wait for it-- give me a year and I will be a much more balanced and developed version of me.